Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Disturbing bathroom configurations

We are going through renovations at work and while that is happening my office has been temporarily moved to another building that joined to the hospital main building. The bathrooms in this building are extremely small. By my estimation they can't be any larger than 4' x 4'. It's basically a linen closet with a sink and toilet.

Without divulging too much about my bodily functions, let's just say that I am very regular and leave it at that. At least at one point in the work day I will have to have a B.M. The bathroom in my building is not suited for this. Not only is it small but the toilet seat is at a weird angle, slightly turned to the wall. And, there is no ventilation whatsoever.

So when I feel the need to drop a deuce I walk over the hospital's main building and usually go into the first bathroom I come to as I enter, which is right by the gift shop. Being a hospital there are all sorts of handicapped-accessible restrooms all over the place and this is one of them. The stall with the toilet in it it very large. So large that it even has its own sink, right in the stall. Above the sink is a mirror which is attached to the wall at an angle, leaning slightly forward so that someone confined to a wheelchair can clearly see themselves.

Here is the disturbing part:
The sink is directly across from the toilet. I sit down and I have a front row seat to my own B.M. Nice, huh? It could have been placed to the left or the right slightly; there's ample room... Nope!

Didn't anybody think about these things when they designed the room!? Evidently not.

This is not the first time I have run into this sort of short-sightedness.

When we went to go buy our car it was quite a lengthy process bartering and bargaining with the finance person to try and get the payments in a range that worked well for us. As this was going on and the person with whom we were dealing was on the phone, I excused myself to go to the bathroom (no, not a number 2).

I walk down the hall and into the men's room, which is laid out very nicely. Potted plants, nice pictures on the walls, etc. And over the sink is a huge mirror made up of individual mirrored tiles that stretched the entire width of the wall. To the right of the sink is... the toilet. I position myself in front of the toilet, unzip my fly and... wow! There it is...

Of course, being the smartass that I am I simply could not resist mentioning the glaring flaw in the layout of the bathroom to the finance person, much to her embarrassment and much, much more to my wife's mortification.

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